Transcript for jenX: Dispatches from Life in the Middle, Episode 2

Tuesday, October 26, 2021

Guest: Viktoria Valenzuela

Host: Jen Hamilton Hernandez

Jen: Hey everybody, welcome back to the jenX show. Today I have a guest. I’m so excited. It’s my first time having a guest. Before we get started with my guest, Viktoria Valenzuela, I’m going to say the opinions expressed on jenX are the opinions of jenX and guests only and do not reflect the opinions of KBSR as a whole. 

So I’m glad you all are here with us today. I want to get into it as quickly as possible because Viktoria and I have so much planned today for you all. So much. It’s a full schedule. You hear Viktoria laughing. I’ll tell you how I met Viktoria in a moment but I asked her to be on this show today because she’s a poet, she’s a mother, she is an activist, politically active. She knows a thing or two about music, comes from a musical family. And we’re also going to talk about grief and loss a little and how those are connected to creativity and all the other topics. 

So first, Viktoria Valenzuela is completing her coursework for a master’s of English literature, creative writing, and social justice at Our Lady of the Lake University. That’s in San Antonio. She’s set to graduate in December 2021 -- let the countdown begin. Viktoria is an inaugural Zoeglossia Fellow, a Macondista, the San Antonio chapter lead for Women Who Submit, and the event organizer of 100 Thousand Poets for Change San Antonio. Her writing keeps focus on Chicana m(other) scholarship, human rights topics, disability studies, and Chicana feminist holistic pedagogy. She’s a writer and an activist whose work is anthologized in Puro Chicanx Writers of the 21st Century, We Are Not Your Metaphor, a Zoeglossia anthology, PoetryBay Online Journal, MUTHA Magazine, The MALCS Journal, and A Prince Tribute Anthology: I Only Wanted One Time to See You Laughing. Valenzuela is married to the poet Vincent Cooper. They share six children and live in San Antonio, Texas. As we can tell, that’s a full life, right Viktoria? 

Viktoria: I’m doing it and I’m doing it all. Why not? Life is Short. 

Jen: I met you in 2018 through Gemini Ink. That’s an organization so dear to my heart in San Antonio. I worked there a long time ago as a program director. Before I even worked there I took classes there and went to events. For folks who are not familiar, Gemini Ink is a literary organization in San Antonio. You do not have to live in San Antonio to enjoy the fruits of that organization. You can just go to Geminiink.org. They’ve got classes, public events, free things, things that you pay for and that are well worth it. 

So in 2018 they were getting ready for the Summer Writing Festival. They have that every year. And I decided I wanted to do a panel. I had just started back up freelancing again after becoming a mother, and I wanted to do a panel with some other female writers. So instead of a “man-el,” you know an event man panel, I wanted to get ladies together whose lives are full and talk about how do we do all this stuff, and how do we keep going. I never knew since that happened, then we would have the shitshow of a pandemic and the challenge would be even greater to create through all the busyness. So, now that we’ve got Viktoria here I wanted to talk to you about -- you and Vincent share six children, three of them at home right now, correct? 

Viktoria: Correct. Our three olders are moved out. They’re fiercely independent children. I think I did something right, I assume. They don’t call their mama though. They’re too independent I think. (Laughs)

Jen: You did. You did it right then. 

Viktoria: I did it! (Laughs)

Jen: So what I know of a mother’s schedule, I have one as opposed to three, but wake-up call is around six. Or earlier, like internal clock sometimes is like, bing! 3:30 in the morning waking you up for no reason. 

Viktoria: Yeah. 

Jen: And then you try to have some time for yourself at the end of the day. So when, why, how do you write? How are you doing all of this?

Viktoria: Okay. I think it’s magic. I’m not so sure. Organizing is not my forte. I’m a Sagittarius. I am kind of a “fly by the seat of your pants” kind of a person. I always have been. Luckily my husband is very organized. But my children wake up around seven in the morning and everybody’s getting ready for the day. And I homeschool so we start out with doing sign language good mornings; I’m trying to teach them sign language a little bit. And we’ll watch a lot of YouTube educational videos. We’ll do the little homeschool until noon and then lunch. And after lunch it’s sort of a free-for-all, which means everybody leaves me alone and I do my homework for grad school (laughs). And then make the dinner at 5:00. Feed everyone. It feels like I’m feeding everybody all day long. And then more homework for me. Everybody else hangs out with Dad. And then I’m up until my homework’s done. Most of my stuff happens after they’re asleep. My thinking, my writing time. And I don’t sleep very much. I’m also perimenopausal. 

Jen: Mmm-hmm, yep. 

Viktoria: Shout out to my perimenopausal ladies. 

Jen: Yeah, we’re sweaty and we don’t sleep. 

Viktoria: We’re sweaty and we don’t sleep. Four hours of sleep is a good night. Five hours. So I’m up midnight to about two in the morning. I’m writing new poetry and doing what’s just for me. So that’s really how it all gets done. It’s just, everything has its little schedule. 

Jen: So there are people who -- and I’ve watched writers over the years, for years and years -- a lot of women that I see who are mothers will really get started hardcore once the babies have left the nest. They save that for the empty nest phase. Other people who are creating while the children are there feel guilty about it. And I’m not in that camp. I’m still doing all the things. And you too. But what would you say to people who are maybe waiting for that, waiting for the kids to move out? 

Viktoria: I say honestly, life is so short and everybody gets -- my brother Cayetano Valenzuela, he says everybody gets 24 hours in a day. And he’s constantly saying that to me. So he’s like, “Just use your time.” My husband wrote his first poetry book while riding the bus to work, and that was way back over 10 years ago. But if you know Google Drive, you can use your Google Drive on your phone, and if you have a minute to sit -- and this includes you’re standing in the grocery line, you’re using the bathroom, hiding from the children. You know how you’re in there and you’re just like, not really going to the bathroom; you’re just in the bathroom because of the kids. 

Jen: Scrolling, yes. 

Viktoria: Scrolling. Instead of scrolling pull out your Drive, because that has really been a lifesaver. I was literally -- I wrote a new poem last night at about two in the morning in bed, all the lights off, on my Google Drive. It’s every spare minute that you can. Thinking is writing also. Sometimes writing is not literally pen to paper. It’s just thinking about what you’ll write, so that when you finally have that moment you can pull out your Google Drive or some other app on your phone and you have it there. You can write it there. Everything can happen because we literally live in the future. 

Jen: Yes. 

Viktoria: It’s all available. 

Jen: Yeah, and I feel like if you don’t then you’re going to have regrets about that. Because folks who are creative, which I think are most people, even if they’re not publishing or have their art in a gallery there’s some creative itch that everyone has, and that’s just going to keep coming up if you don’t take that moment to put that into the Google doc, like you said. 

Viktoria: Totally. Another thing that I do, just to give myself longer time, and I haven’t done it in a few years because of the pandemic and because of grad school, is I was teaching writing workshops. And when I’m teaching, I’m writing with my students. And I got a lot of really great poems out of that, those sessions. You know, my own writing prompts or feeding off a classroom of people. I also am the chapter lead for Women Who Submit, which is out of California but there are chapters all over the country. And we gather in a public place where there’s internet and we send work out to top-tier literary journals just to like, shake up the system, you know? We’ve got to shake it up. So my good friend Xochitl-Julisa Bermejo and friends created that years ago in response to the -- oh, what was that called? I’m having brain fog. It was a report that women were not -- women of color in particular were not getting published. 

Jen: Yes. 

Viktoria: So they created a day, a submission blitz, where all the women of color can submit to those top-tier journals on the same day. So I’ve had some sessions here in San Antonio and they have been super-awesome for sisterhood and also to read each other’s work and informally critique each other, give each other advice. I’ve had guest speakers come in like Sheila Black and Alexandra van de Kamp to talk about professional publishing. And you know, it has really helped. We’ve gotten a lot of people published and they’re actually coming out, the entire faction is coming out with an anthology this year. So they live for it.

Jen: Oh, I love that. 

Viktoria: Yeah. 

Jen: Love that. And then these are women that just, yeah -- you’re right. Shake up the system, got together, there’s energy in that, group energy. And accountability, right? 

Viktoria: Right.

Jen: Because if you’ve got to meet with somebody at a certain time and day then you’re going to get your stuff together. 

Viktoria: Yes. 

Jen: And sometimes you see, oh, they’re submitting to -- or somebody got something published and you might feel bad for yourself for a second and then you’re like, “Well, I can do that too.”

Viktoria: Yeah, totally. And in sisterhood -- and it’s not just gendered women. It’s actually women and nonbinary people getting together and really supporting each other in this beautiful cloud of positivity. 

Jen: I love that. Women Who Submit. I remember now, that was the first thing that Alexandra -- shout out, Alexandra at Gemini Ink, again -- that was the first thing that she told me about you when I was looking to put this panel together. Okay, I have a poem I wonder if you could read for us before we go to a song break. And then we’ll come back and talk some more. But you have this poem, The Poems Before Them. 

Viktoria: Yes. The Poems Before Them is a poem I wrote while pregnant. And I wrote a lot of poetry when I was pregnant, for the babies. So this poem was just a meditation on mothering I suppose. 

Viktoria reads The Poems Before Them

Jen: Thank you. That’s Viktoria Valenzuela. Y’all, we’re going to take a song break. This entire playlist, Viktoria created it for us today. And we’ll get started with the first one. This is from Janelle Monáe (featuring Big Boi). So here we go with just a get up, dance, move song break. Here we go. 

Song: “Tightrope” by Janelle Monáe

Jen: We are back with Viktoria. I love that song. We were dancing over here. 

Viktoria: Cool. That’s my jam. 

Jen: It is so good. Thank you for that pick. We’re going to move into something -- this is that time of year, right? We’ve got Halloween and next week is right after -- quick on the heels of Halloween is Día de los Muertos. And it’s a time of year when it’s said all over the world - -there’s All Hallows Eve -- everybody kind of celebrates in a different way around the world. But it’s said that the veil is just a little thinner between where we are and the people who have passed, and our ancestors, people who’ve come before us. So I just wanted to talk to you because I know you’re not the only one. Like I said, it’s been a rough couple of years. And when I say you’re not the only one I mean Viktoria my guest, but also listeners. There has been some loss, mourning, grief, all of that. Not all related to Covid, just some of it popped up as well on top of it, over the past couple of years. And Viktoria has a poem, Día de los Muertos, that she’ll read later after we’re finished talking a bit. But I wanted to know, in your creative process what kind of a role does grief and mourning and loss -- how does it inform your creative process? 

Viktoria: So a lot of my writing, not just my poetry but also my creative nonfiction, fiction, and research does come from that place of grief. And I think it’s just a way to not keep it in my body, because I’m very mindful of my body. I suffer from fibromyalgia, so my emotions literally have a physical sensation of pain. And it sounds kinda hokey when I say that -- wow. 

Jen: Not really. 

Viktoria: (laughs) I really do suffer with pain when I have strong emotion. So on December 3 last year it was finals week. My grad squad bestie, ST Shimi, was messaging me every hour, “How many pages you got? How many pages you got? What are you writing now?” You know? We had all these pages to turn in for our final portfolio for one of our classes. I think she was actually in both of my classes. And she had to work that night and we had constantly been safe at home, lockdown, on lockdown. And it was just one of those nights where she was like, “Okay, I’m going to start going back to work.” She was a burlesque dancer and she was going to her studio. Crossing the street, a car hit her and killed her. And I was confused that that happened because she had just messaged me not even an hour before, “How many pages you got?” And for the rest of the night I figured, she’s at work. And in the morning our department sent an email and said, “This is true. She’s gone.” And I couldn’t understand it. And neither could the rest of the world that knew and loved ST Shimi. She was a creator, a performer, writer, dancer, stage manager, pole dancer, fire eater, burlesque performer, belly dancer. An aerialist. A badass scholar, a badass poet, a teacher, a wife, a dog mom. 

Jen: Just a force. A force. 

Viktoria: Activist. She raised money for Planned Parenthood every year with shows that she did, masquerade shows and things. She was everything to everyone that knew and loved her. She was everything. She was the fucking coolest. So yeah, I wrote a poem for her that I have not read publicly because I’m just not ready. I’m just not ready. But a lot of my poetry comes from that. And it’s just -- it’s like a creative lake that you pull from and you write these things. The phrases come and I just create them. So this poem, these poems that I write are just because of the intense emotion I guess. 

Jen: And I think also another, what you’re talking about -- getting it out of your body -- and then another layer of that that I think is rough is that some of the people that we’ve lost over the last couple of years, either we live in another part of the country or they lived in another part of the country. So some of us really need to go to a funeral or to see a body or to have some sort of real, material closure. And we haven’t all been able to get that. And even before Covid, after Covid, whenever -- if there’s ever going to be an after -- we still, sometimes that’s just not -- it doesn’t work that way. We can’t be there to go to these -- that’s why we have these rites of passage and rituals and ceremonies. And if there’s no formal ceremony that we can attend -- there might be one but we can’t be there -- I feel like then it’s extra important to find an outlet. Do you have any rituals for those that you can’t attend, or can you speak to that? 

Viktoria: In my mind poetry is medicine. I know my friend Melissa Bennett, who is also a Native American poet in Washington State, says that the actual words are medicine. The actual poetry is a medicine that we need. I did lose people in Covid. My oldest child had Covid and didn’t -- I don’t know what it is with that boy. And he’s 23 now. And he had Covid for all of July 2020 and called no one. He just slept and drank a lot of tea, because apparently he knows everything. Ugh. So you write poems because that exasperated feeling, that fear that I had, it can only come out in poetry or writings. I lost a cousin who was only sick for five days at the beginning of Covid. His heart exploded in his chest on the way to the emergency room because he thought it wasn’t so bad. I lost -- my older half-brother lost his mother. She had only been sick a few days and she had underlying health conditions. I lost a good friend, a trans woman named Claire, who was a brilliant writer and was only sick for six days and documented all of her daily feelings and emotions and jokes and stuff, and on the seventh day her family informed that she did not make it through the night. 

So Covid has taken people in such an ugly way. What are we supposed to do with these emotions but write them down, make art. I actually created an entire booklet of prompts for the Blue Star -- I can’t remember what the initiative was called but my friend Mari Hernandez who’s a brilliant photographer and artist asked me to create writing prompts for people with terminally ill cancer so that they would leave a legacy for their families. Poetry is more than just pretty words on a page or spoken word things. It’s more than that. To those who write it, to those who hear it, to those who reshare those poems, you can take a poem and share it with your friend and you’re in the same moment of emotion. You’re sharing a body almost in the poetry. It’s sacred. It’s a sacred happening. Everyone should be writing poetry. Everybody should be sharing poetry. Poetry is a gift. 

Jen: Amen. Yes. I agree. One of the reasons I wanted to have you here today. Really quickly, I wonder if you can tell me -- so Día de los Muertos is coming up next week. We do celebrate -- and in our house with the altar, and it helps really my son. There are people in our family that passed when he was two, or passed before he was born. So it helps him to keep those stories alive for him. And it helps the rest of us too. But I wonder what that celebration -- do you celebrate? What does it look like in your home? 

Viktoria: We’ve already started building our altar. We start at the beginning of the month. We’ve just been gathering items. And because I’m homeschooling the children I teach them about the different parts of the altar. We put our sacred items on the table. And we have our images of our antepasados. So for them it’s not like a day that that one thing happens. It’s all month, and it’s something that we just continue to contribute throughout the month, of building up that particular altar. But every day I have an altar in my house. All the days. I have a plate with coins in it. I have the pictures of my cousins who have passed. My grandparents, who have all passed. And I have sacred items that I keep right next to my television, which is kind of a funny spot but my house is very small. (Laughs) 

Jen: Same

Viktoria: So if the children find a coin or what they deem a sacred item, they add it to the altar, every day. Every day we have an altar. So for them it’s a normal, regular thing. 

Jen: And you have a poem called Día de los Muertos. So I think now would be a good time, if you want to read that and then we’ll go to another song break. 

Viktoria: Yes. Let me preface this by saying, I wrote this poem at the beginning of my relationship with my husband, Vincent Cooper. And it was a funny thing. I was just looking at him. And I just became overwhelmed with this feeling that someday we’ll die. (Laughs). So morbid. But I just couldn’t, I just couldn’t shake the feeling I had to write this poem. 

Viktoria reads Día de los Muertos

Jen: Thank you. So folks, I’m here today with my first guest on this show, Viktoria Valenzuela, a poet and mother, scholar, and many other things, from San Antonio. And I’m going to play another one of her picks. This is from Chicano Batman. So we’re going to rock out some more, have a break. Like I said, get up, jump around, and we’ll be back once the song finishes out.

Song: “Itotiani” by Chicano Batman

Jen: Viktoria, I’m going to bring us back a little early. I love this song. But I wanted to get to some other topics with you today. While I do have you on the phone I wanted to get back to some other topics. Y’all, I’ve got Viktoria Valenzuela here today. What you just heard was Chicano Batman, and the song is “Itotiani.” So if you’re just coming in we’ve got Viktoria Valenzuela. She’s a San Antonio poet, activist, scholar, mother, all of those things. Talking to us about a variety of topics today. 

Before we move on with our conversation I want to take care of some KBSR station housekeeping. Thank you all for listening today, whether it’s your first time listening to KBSR or if you’ve been here before, thank you so much. And I’m just going to say KBSR is an independent and free digital radio station funded by listener support on Patreon. You can become a member for as low as $5/month, the cost of a little snack per month, by visiting our Patreon page, which is Black Sparrow Radio if you’re looking under Patreon. Or you can find us at blacksparrowmusicparlor.com. With membership you get a newsletter. Sometimes little extras come to you in the mail if you add your mailing address when you sign up for a Patreon membership, and also some cool KBSR merch at a discount. Speaking of KBSR merch, I have -- just before we get back to our conversation -- one t-shirt to give away today, KBSR t-shirts. If you’ve been on the site you’ve seen our logo -- to the first person who emails me with what size t-shirt I should send you, and also where should I send that to. So I need your t-shirt size and your mailing address. I’ll give you the email address to send this to. It’s jenxkbsr@gmail.com. First person to send me an email there with your t-shirt size and address, then I will send you a t-shirt. Viktoria? 

Viktoria: Yeah, cool. 

Jen: So we have about 20 minutes left and I’m going to kind of skip around. I know we talked before and I gave you kind of a rundown, but I wanted to jump -- we’ll come back to music in a bit but I wanted to jump into, since some things happened in Texas yesterday. 

Viktoria: Oh. I’m ready to fight. Are you ready to fight? 

Jen: I’m ready to -- yeah! Who are we going to punch? Do you have a punching bag? Do you have something you can hit? 

Viktoria: You know, I do write poetry about it. I do organize the 100 Thousand Poets for Change San Antonio event, where poets can come and express their political views, because I only accept political poetry. And we do work to create change. We do need to change policies. And there are tons of ways to do that. That’s why I call myself activist. If I’m not being active I hope to inspire others to become active. 

Jen: Yes, and that’s what -- another one of the many reasons I wanted to have you on the show today is that I know you’re active and I know you inspire plenty of others to be active as well. And yesterday we were texting or emailing way before the show this morning and I kind of joked, okay, yesterday in Texas Abbott signed three -- several bills from the third legislative session into law. And the dogs one -- it was a good day for dogs in Texas. We can celebrate that before I go on to the rest. So he signed a bill into law that makes the unlawful restraint of a dog a crime in Texas, like chains and heavy weights and all that. Those awful things. I have two dogs. Yea, good for the dogs. But we’ve got to move on. He also approved Texas’ new political maps. So for people who don’t know -- I’ve got friends from around the country. And definitely during the winter storm there was some noise on Twitter like we deserve it because we’re a red state. 

Viktoria: Mmm. 

Jen: And you kind of know what I’m getting at. What people don’t understand about Texas --

Viktoria: Right. Yeah, and it’s so sad. 

Jen: Yeah, so we are -- a lot of folks here are gerrymandered out of representation. It’s not that everybody votes for these things. 

Viktoria: Nope. 

Jen: It may seem that way if you’re living somewhere across the country or across the world. But I’m reading this from the Texas Tribune. “The maps were drawn [about redistricting] to maintain Texas Republicans’ majorities for the next decade. They simultaneously diminished the power of voters of color -- despite new census numbers pointing to Texans of color as the main force behind the state’s population growth. The new districts will be used for the first time in next year’s primary and general elections, barring any court interventions.” And then on top of that there was House Bill 25, transgender student athletes, which will restrict Texas transgender student athletes from playing on K-12 school sports teams that align with their gender identity. 

Viktoria: That’s just horrible. You know, Texas policymakers have been attacking transgender issues the whole time, and I find it disgusting and appalling because our trans friends are -- they’re sacred and we should not allow this to continue to happen. So I’m definitely looking to support my trans family, friends, where we can. Especially my children have a best friend that is a trans child. So I’m looking at my friends -- little bestie and she does go to public school, and what if she does want to play sports? She’s already not allowed to play a sport because of this law? This is outrageous, and it really cannot stand. I know you asked me about how to help or how to change these policies. I know that one group in particular -- my cousin Gloria is the executive director of Jolt. It’s right there in Austin. Have you heard of Jolt? 

Jen: I haven’t. No. So I learned something new today. 

Viktoria: It’s called Jolt Action. And it’s really for young people because to me, the young people are the ones who are going to change all of this. I’m so proud of kids. I’m so proud of the 20 and under, or even 30 and under “kids” (laughs). They are doing amazing work and Jolt Action is a group right there in Austin that brings artists and musicians together to lift up issues and voices in the Latino community. But you know, there’s also the Black Lives Matter. And they’re all like, young people. And it’s so great. Jolt in particular is training young people how to change policy from the standpoint of the government. It’s not just grassroots. It’s more than that. 

Jen: Yeah, I like that. My fulltime job is I teach English at the community college here in Central Texas, in Austin. And I know -- we cannot say never, and never would I, because my student-teacher relationship is a different thing than friendships and all of that. So never would I ever tell my students how to vote. It’s also illegal in Texas anyway. I just say, make sure that you guys are able to -- we work in the class Critical Thinking Skills, understanding where your information comes from and making sure that you’re informed. And if they vote differently than I do, so be it. It doesn’t matter because I’m there to help them with their writing. 

However, what I did notice especially when Trump was -- 2020 election, and 2016 even, a lot of the younger folks that I knew around campus would say they don’t want to vote because all politicians are the same. Either side, they’re corrupt. That kind of thing. So when you talk about this group in Austin, that’s heartening because I’m thinking, okay, good. There are still folks who think, “Maybe, maybe not.” But there is -- choose a side that aligns with your values and what you want for kids going forward. And when you talked about your child’s bestie, this is something that I think about with climate change and all of the issues facing us. I have maybe 30, 40 years left at best, you know? But the kids are going to be here for much longer going forward. So things like what we experienced with the grid failure, not being prepared, there’s just going to be more of that, unfortunately. 

Viktoria: You know, I don’t know if it’s because I have grown children and I don’t understand them entirely, because they are the next evolution of us. These kids, all kids. They are going to say things like, “Why should I vote; it doesn’t matter,” because literally they understand something that we don’t. We were educated in this way that has us believing in democracy, believing in the American Dream. The kids are like, “Uh, yeah -- none of that exists for me.” As GenX’ers we know that we’re in the middle of these two different forms of thought. Like the people older than us had the American Dream, had the potential to reach it. GenX’ers are just sort of -- I don’t know. 

Jen: Paying our rent and our mortgage and keeping the whole household going. 

Viktoria: Right. But at the same time my husband and I are still like, trying to achieve this “American Dream” with our perfect job and all that. And honestly, I don’t know. I don’t see an end in sight. I don’t see a stasis happening. And my daughter in particular, she’s 21 now. She was being groomed to become like a bakery chain store opener -- I don’t know what it’s called. She was going to open new chains around the country. But because the workplace was so toxic, homegirl said, “I’m out.” And she quit her job last week and got a new job working for like a socially conscious organic juice bar that actually does line up with her political beliefs. She had the understanding, the will, and the actual action that she put into place to make her life exactly what she requires and wants it to be, and it aligns with her political values and her identity as a fluid gender person. Homegirl did it. I’m very proud of her, honestly. 

Jen: Yeah, and let me ask you, because this is a thing that we used to do and now people are like, “That’s not even necessary,” so I just have to ask you. When she quit her job did she put in her two-week notice? 

Viktoria: She left for the day and left a note on the desk and said, “I’m out. I’m not coming back.” And I said, “You go, girl. You tell ‘em.” 

Jen: Oh my gosh. I love it. Yeah. Good. Good for her. 

Viktoria: But you know, they were really trying to exploit her because she is a Chicana, because she’s -- you know? Because of her skin tone. She’s a very indigenous-looking girl. And they had her working 60 hours a week and only gave her a raise after almost two years of a dollar. So she was like, “I quit.” And the job she has pays much better and she can make her own hours. And politically they line up with her, and it’s all organic. She’s so happy, and I’m very proud of her. 

Jen: Good. Yeah, you’re right -- 

Viktoria: That’s why I say the kids are all right. They really know what they’re doing. And you see all across -- like people that are doing things like the Black Freedom Factory. Kimiya is like, really blowing up San Antonio. She’s so young and I’m just like, “Girl, I’m so proud of you.” She’s making change, you know? And it’s really great to see. That’s why I really gravitated toward this Jolt Action, because they are training to change policy, like in a legal way. And when I was doing my activism it was really like -- I feel like I was the -- just the first spark to help others see what needs to change. And that’s why I do the 100 Thousand Poets for Change, to spark that change. A lot has happened because of those shows. I don’t know if we have time to go into all that. (Laughs)

Jen: We may not but I was going to say, everything you’ve just said gives me hope, because when you do wake up and you read like, okay -- it was a good day for the dogs but maybe not for the rest of us, you know? And then you’re wondering, well, how do we move forward, where does the hope come from. So that’s really what it is, is people, the job -- 

Viktoria: Right. And honestly -- not to cut you off, but I honestly don’t believe that we need to reinvent the wheel. I think we need to just support the people that are already doing the work, and it happens to be young people. Seriously support young people in your community.

Jen: And I’m going to put -- those of y’all who don’t know, I have a newsletter that I send out every Monday. And it’s usually notes about the show to come on Tuesday but I’m also going to start putting kind of a recap of the former show in there. So next Monday what will go out will be the newsletter for the jenX show, and I’ll put some links, Viktoria, to these organizations so people can -- and also on Instagram later on. I’ll just tell you real quick -- my website is jenhamiltontx.com. If you go to the Links section you’ll see links to my newsletter. And then on Instagram jenhamiltontx is my handle and I’ll put some stories on there later today. This has been fun. We have five minutes. We’re not done yet. 

Viktoria: Whoo! 

Jen: We are going to have to cut some of the things that we were going to talk about, but it’s important to put the political side out there. So I think what I’d like to do with the rest of our time, Viktoria, is delve into the music part briefly, and then maybe you can choose Prince -- Prince can take us out or Lunachicks can take us out, or Tracy Chapman. I’ll put our playlist draft out there, all the songs we were going to get to. So your pick for the last song. But I wanted to talk to you -- we have about five minutes, so a brief conversation and then a song and we’ll have to finish up. Your grandfather was a musician, and this is where those of us can show up and learn today. It’s a genre of music called Orquesta?

Viktoria: Yes. 

Jen: So can you tell us, where did he play? What was his role? Who did he play with? And how has that fed into your poetry -- a short answer and we’ll squeeze in a song too. 

Viktoria: So my grandfather, Cayetano Valenzuela, was a big band musician, Orquesta players always. And I thought that my siblings and I were the first to go to college, but it turns out he was the first to go to college and get a degree in music in 1921, right here in San Antonio. And when I was still living in New York -- I didn’t move to San Antonio again until 2011 -- I was looking to research his legacy. Because my family doesn’t remember and my grandmother passed. And when I got here my grandmother was already in deep stages of dementia, so she couldn’t tell me anything. So I started looking into it and I created my Luminaria dramatic reading for 2013, just a long poem about what he did. And I actually hired the West Side Horns to play two of his songs because my father had the handwritten music, my grandfather’s handwritten notes. So it was pretty amazing. So they played two of his songs for me, and I did get them on a CD and I played them during my poetry reading. 

But our family has always been musical. I cannot play an instrument but I can -- well, maybe not so much now. I used to be able to sing. My siblings play guitar. My children are all very musical. My daughter actually had many albums that she never released, my 21-year-old. Kids -- I don’t know. I don’t get them sometimes. (Laughs) We’re all very musical. We’re all very artistic. And I think it all comes from my grandfather. And he raised 10 children on the west side of San Antonio as a big band musician. He played with Louis Armstrong, when Louis Armstrong came to town. He played every instrument, from saxophone to banjo to drums -- everything. And he played all around South Texas in these shows, and he played on the air force base clubs, you know the cute little nightclubs. He wore tuxedos; he had bands. And he also worked as an airplane mechanic at Randolph Air Force Base. That was his day job. 

Jen: What a legacy. What a legacy. 

Viktoria: Right? Yes, and I have his degree right next to my degree. I hung his diploma, his music diploma right next to my bachelor’s degree. 

Jen: I love that. So we have a couple minutes left. You’re going to get your master’s degree in December.

Viktoria: In December. I’ve got to finish my coursework. Aggh! 

Jen: You got it though.

Viktoria: I got it, I got it. 

Jen: Okay, so I think on that note maybe we should let West Side Horns sign us off? 

Viktoria: Oh yeah, I would love that. Yes. 

Jen: Okay, we’ll do that. 

Viktoria: Find me on Facebook, find me on Instagram. Just Viktoria Valenzuela. I spell it a funny way. But yeah, I’m very locatable.

Jen: Okay, that was the last thing I was going to ask you, is where can we find you online. So we got that. Thank you so much. 

Viktoria: Thank you. 

Jen: Obviously we could fill up another -- I would love to have you back sometime because we have so much more that we can talk about with folks. But thank you so much for your time today. I know you’re busy and graduating soon. But we’re going to have a sample of the West Side Horns to sign us off. And everybody who’s listening, enjoy the rest of your day and the rest of our programming here on KBSR. We’ve got Ryan and Shannon coming up at 2:00, Billy Gartner at 5:00, and you can go on the KBSR website to see the rest of the schedule. But thank you all for tuning in to KBSR where Tuesdays rock, with today’s guest Viktoria Valenzuela. 

Viktoria: Thank you so much. 

Jen: Thank you.